I’ve stayed away from Itsy Bitsy Inklings for a while now, mostly because of a looming, lingering depression, but I’m coming home. I don’t like to be a negative person. I would prefer to write uplifting posts, and when I’m depressed — no shock here — I’m extremely negative… irritable too, just ask my husband. I don’t have an issue with others writing about their lives, even when it’s not-so-good, but for some reason, I don’t like doing it myself. I’m not sure whether that’s because I don’t want to admit to myself that my life can be a gloomy place to live sometimes, or if I just think that others don’t want to hear about it — maybe a little bit of both. At any rate, it’s the way my brain works, and who said that was supposed to make sense in the first place?
The ugly depression has lifted for now, and I feel pretty positive about life. I have a new idea for a story to post on Dark Wood Scrolls. I’m letting it marinade for a little while, while I iron out all of the kinks in my mind. During my depression, I was actually able to write a couple of decent stories Bayview Bridge and Wendigo. I’m proud of myself for working through the pain. I also posted Indigo Desert which came from a particularly dark place, but I’m not very fond of that piece. My writing never comes out as vibrant as the thought which inspired it — I think that every writer has been plagued by this — but this one is extremely pale in comparison. At least, in my mind it is. It isn’t bad though, and, considering how debilitating the sadness was at that time, I’m damned proud to have written it.
I’m trying to bring myself back into a place where I can get into the writing habit again. There has been a lot of disruption in my life over the past seven months. We put our house on the market, sold it, had to move in with my parents for a while, and moved into a new house. It’s all positive stuff, but still a lot of stress comes with all of those things. I finally have my diva den though, and it is now fully complete with the addition of my new desk. Hopefully, this will entice me to write more. I’ve worked very hard over the past few months to get my diva den just the way I want it. I love it. It’s my happy, comfy spot. I think that it will work out nicely in my endeavor to write more often. I feel very drawn to this space. It’s good to be home.